11-28-08
I’ve been thinking of the “comings and goings” of life and decided to discuss this with Time. “Time, you illusionist, you show us there’s nothing up your sleeve, then, as if from thin air, you produce summer, fall, winter, spring. Delighted, we applaud. Then, one by one, the places we’ve lived, the people we’ve loved, appear from behind one curtain and disappear behind another. Amazing! Then in the blink of an eye, we, too, disappear. How about that!
“Time, what am I going to do with you? I wanted to milk today for all it was worth, as if you were a cow and all I needed was a bucket. But no sooner did I get started than you swished your tail and this bright new day is gone. ‘How can this be?’ I gasped. You raised your head and looked at me with eyes so big you’d think there would be room in them for some compassion. ‘Don’t forget your bucket,’ you said.”
In all of this “coming and going”, I need to remember that the world will go on being the world without me and without my endless attempts to turn what I know into language that will stand the test of time. And what kind of test is that, exactly? Time looks at me over the top of his reading glasses. “I guess you’ll just have to wait and see,” Time says.
I believe the true blessing of aging is that it can bring an awareness that there is a purpose to growing older, a coming home to the self, and a discovery of significance in a life that is so often stuffed full of busyness.
There’s nothing more gorgeous than a person’s unseen beauty, the kind that may take nearly a lifetime to cultivate. The young at heart are at home in every generation.
You said that you would like to send a book, and I would like to make a suggestion that instead of a book, the gift that would be most practical and helpful would be a money order payable to me with 140237 after my name. I know this seems impersonal, but it’s what would help the most. We have received a 25% cut in our meager pay and the cost of clothes and necessities that have to buy have been dramatically increased. Thank you for asking. That’s so thoughtful of you.
In these uncertain times, some people seem to have the opinion that the prison environment is one that is safer and more stable than that of the “outside world”. I’d like to respond to that opinion –
Safer? Of course there is more security, but there is also a higher concentration of those who commit violent crimes. Overall, I would not say it’s safer.
More stable? When freedoms are taken away, some of the results of poor decisions are removed. Ruts are stable and comfortable, but they rob us of creativity and innovation, and they rob us of our dreams.
I’ll take freedom any day hands down!!
I’ve made up a list of the gains and losses of the prison experience. It’s far from being complete, but it’s a few points that I thought of.
As much as possible, I like to focus on what is beyond uncertainty. No matter what decisions will be made by a new administration, there are some things that are changeless. Daffodils will bloom in the spring. Men and women will fall in love and, sadly, out of love. A broken heart will nonetheless keep beating one hundred thousand times a day.
No matter what governmental decisions are made, writers will write. Painters will paint. Three in the morning will still be three in the morning. The door in our psyche we don’t want to walk through will still be just down the hall. No matter what decisions are made, life will hand us the invisible threat that connects us all, love will hand us the needle.
Gains and Losses From The Prison Experience
Gains:
1. The gift of extra time that provides the opportunity to transform the inmate’s thoughts, and thus, his life, if he so chooses.
2. Basic survival needs are met. Though of poor quality, food, shelter, medical, and dental needs are met.
3. The same daily routine provides a bit of stability.
4. Life is simpler. There is less drama
5. There are opportunities to advance in education and work skills.
Losses:
1.The loss of sharing a daily life with a mate.
2.The loss of sharing special occasions with family and friends (holidays, anniversaries, birthdays, weddings, graduations, and funerals)
3.The loss of freedom to move about freely
4.The loss of freedom to make hundreds of decisions each day (what you can eat and who you can visit, where you can work and what kind of joy you can get, etc.)
5.The loss of reputations and personal dignity
6.The loss of privacy
7.The loss of material possessions
8.The loss of dreams
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